how hairy? two words: wookie tits
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
