before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Randomize