hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize