So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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