Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
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