He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
