Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
