3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
We're facebook friends in real life
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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