My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
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