Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
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