So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
so much tequila, so little girl.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
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