And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
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