what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize