Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
