ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Randomize
