You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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