Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Dear god my vagina.
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