Hey man sorry I got all grabby
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
