found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
