Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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