You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Randomize
