Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize
