last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
