Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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