now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize