she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
