I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Randomize