plz talk dirty to me
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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