Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Randomize