Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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