all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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