Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
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