I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
