Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
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