gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
