Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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