Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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