We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize
