I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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