Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
