so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Randomize
