covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
zippers are such a cool invention
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize
