i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
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