I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize