woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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