absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
