He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Randomize