I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize