I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Randomize