the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
